words and notion

High self-esteem

Published by

Akhila

on

Why can’t I be over confident?

I don’t understand when my confidence turns out to be overconfidence..

Is there a gap between the two, segregating them?

Have you identified that gap..?

A positive vibe is there in ‘confidence’ while it becomes negative in overconfidence. Why do people tell in this way?

Self-confidence comes from within. So why should one be bothered on what others do?

Above all, does it really matter, whether it is confidence or overconfidence..? Even if it is over confident, either we will work hard to achieve it or we will fail and learn from the mistakes..so what’s wrong in being either way?

89 responses to “High self-esteem”

  1. Yes, to calculated Risks – Words and Notion Avatar
    Yes, to calculated Risks – Words and Notion

    […] I need to find my true self and be better than it […]

    Like

    Reply
  2. Jacque' Avatar
    Jacque’

    The wife and I really love this blog and appreciate the creativity and imagery you provide. Our minds are marvelous and capable of amazing feats, yet most people use them to do little jobs because they lack the confidence you identified in this article. If you ever want to take this blog to the next level by offering a Mobile App version my company Zenlight would love to help for an extremely low price, we appreciate the hard work you have put into this blog and wish you all future success in business and in life.

    Thank you for your time, it is the most precious thing we all possess.
    -Jacque’

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      thanks Jacque for your kindness.. I didnt think about a mobile ap version so far. If I do, will definitely contact you..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Jacque' Avatar
        Jacque’

        We appreciate your consideration Akhila.

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
  3. sinisterdarksoul Avatar
    sinisterdarksoul

    Interesting point of view. It has me thinking.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      thanks.. i am glad with your words. have a good day..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  4. finnegandaley Avatar
    finnegandaley

    Akhila, you question, and that is oh so much more important than answering. Thank you for everything you do.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      good morning and thank you my friend..I am starting my day with your reply..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  5. namrataspeaks Avatar
    namrataspeaks

    What I believe is that being confident makes you believe in yourself, whereas being over confident makes you underestimate others.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      thanks namrata..but when will you identify you were overconfident..?i think it’s a stand of mind only.. can’t be differentiated..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. namrataspeaks Avatar
        namrataspeaks

        Yeah, it would be a bit difficult to differentiate between the two but I think when confidence begins to take a toll on you, you know it’s overconfidence.

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
  6. K. Bellamy with a Purpose Avatar
    K. Bellamy with a Purpose

    There no difference in overconfident or confident. Depends solely on the perceivers perception. Maybe we should just do away with those words and call it self esteem. You know that intangible thing society tells you it’s good to have, yet with every waking moment, it strips us bare of all things related to self esteem… Hi my name is LEO and I live in a backwards ass world. 😁

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      thank you LEO ;)..
      I agree with you fully..the difference lies in the eyes of perceivers..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  7. andy1076 Avatar
    andy1076

    Agreed! 🙂

    Like

    Reply
  8. Jackie Jain Avatar
    Jackie Jain

    Yes, I can relate to this question. I think there is a very thin gap between Confidence and over-confidence. When we believe we will succeed it is confidence and when we think our opponents will never win, it is over-confidence. It doesn’t make much difference when we work hard and try to do our best.

    Have a good time Akhila.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      true.. it does not create a big deal when we are offering our best.
      thanks jackie

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Jackie Jain Avatar
        Jackie Jain

        Yes. True. You are welcome Akhila. . 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
  9. Nisthur Anadi Avatar
    Nisthur Anadi

    Just be natural to you don’t judge your self as be as confident or over confident .

    Don’t care how People judge you.

    If over confidence comes to natural . Let it come and be with you like friend. Or many times you love to be confident just be that.

    Don’t try hard to be what you are not, let be the self. You are unique, beautiful, awesome amazing and what not ….

    Have great time just flow like water, accept the self like earth , be with the self like air.

    Being self is ecstatic. Being the self is blissful.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      true it is.. it is the best one can offer to the self..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Nisthur Anadi Avatar
        Nisthur Anadi

        Being your true self is highest wisdom it gives way to effortless living !😊

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
  10. davekingsbury Avatar
    davekingsbury

    I don’t feel confident in myself but I sometimes feel confident that I am doing the right thing. Does that make sense?

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      ha ha..having confidence on doing the right thing, without confidence in the self..how comes it work..i’m thinking..

      Like

      Reply
      1. davekingsbury Avatar
        davekingsbury

        I think it’s a moral thing, a way of focussing on what’s important rather than worrying about my self …

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
        1. Akhila Avatar
          Akhila

          hmmm…that’s the best way..in a way it is in turn meeting the needs of self itself..

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply
  11. extinct0703 Avatar
    extinct0703

    Overconfidence makes one complacent which in turn is not good.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      hmm..can you recollect a case where you were overconfident and which inturn lead to not so good results.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. extinct0703 Avatar
        extinct0703

        My over confidence had cost me my job, had to go through a very bad phase of two years after that.

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
        1. Akhila Avatar
          Akhila

          good morning Dhiraj…so hope now you are not into that ‘over’ stage now..;)

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply
          1. extinct0703 Avatar
            extinct0703

            Good Morning 🙂
            Definitely not in the over stage ever again

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply
  12. Daisy in the Willows Avatar
    Daisy in the Willows

    Like your new re vamp on the Blog btw 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      thanks daisy..ha, these words really touched me..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  13. Daisy in the Willows Avatar
    Daisy in the Willows

    I think confidence and self-belief are crucial to success. Overconfidence can go two ways. It can lead to bold ideas or it can turn into arrogance- where the person won’t hear what others have to say. I think self-confidence allows more space fro listening to others ideas. Just a thought.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      thanks daisy..i liked your two way definition of overconfidence..and as you said, it’s the self who decides the best way out of the two ways

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Daisy in the Willows Avatar
        Daisy in the Willows

        Well, it is just my opinion but I am glad you can see what angle I am coming at . 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
  14. theonlysup Avatar
    theonlysup

    One small gap I identified is when u say u r confident but u internally u have done zero or below par preparation..

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      hmm.. this is a common man language.. isnt it.. you are sup.. so should come with supreme gaps..;)

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. theonlysup Avatar
        theonlysup

        Ah !! *raises color now*

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
    2. finnegandaley Avatar
      finnegandaley

      Why do you say that? Akhila has shown that she ponders and thinks before she writes.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. theonlysup Avatar
        theonlysup

        I’m talking I’m general. U means anybody in person .. Not akhila ..

        Liked by 2 people

        Reply
        1. Akhila Avatar
          Akhila

          🙂

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply
        2. finnegandaley Avatar
          finnegandaley

          I do apologize! I shouldn’t have come in here picking fights.

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply
          1. Akhila Avatar
            Akhila

            ha ha..dont take it too seriously..this is a fun world.. you have done nothing wrong to be apologist…

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply
          2. theonlysup Avatar
            theonlysup

            its alright friend. may be u misinterpreted the meaning of my comment. its simple “when people pretend to be confident without much preparation , it leads to over confidence .. ” this is just my opinion . 🙂

            Liked by 2 people

            Reply
      2. Akhila Avatar
        Akhila

        ha.. you are so kind and caring.. but he was just mentioning in general..
        anyway i really appreciates your concern for me..thanks a bunch

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
  15. Shalini Sharrma Avatar
    Shalini Sharrma

    plus your blog new makeover is too good, i like this white background and simplified version. Even your bio – always in love .. Aha.. Aha.. good good 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      happy that you noted the makeover.. thanks dear..😉

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  16. Shalini Sharrma Avatar
    Shalini Sharrma

    I learnt it hard way because once i didn’t get through a paper just because i was pretty over confident as my mom said to appear it and let it go. I was confident then, don’t know what went wrong that i had to hear all this, thus, i realized i was much impatient than ever that differentiates the two for me but yes, in general sense one should always learn from experience not from gyaan sending our ways.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      good morning Shals.. you got it exactly..maybe there is a lesson waiting for me..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Shalini Sharrma Avatar
        Shalini Sharrma

        Good Afternoon ! Wish you learn it with minimum loss. Good luck !

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
        1. Akhila Avatar
          Akhila

          ha ha.. trying…

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply
  17. pins & ashes Avatar
    pins & ashes

    Totally upon you/or the person concerned. If you want to be confident, over confident or defident, just be and ya shut out the society!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      good morning aswathy…

      Like

      Reply
      1. pins & ashes Avatar
        pins & ashes

        morning Akhila.. had a splendid rain soaked one, you?
        ps what do people call you for short? Aki?

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
        1. Akhila Avatar
          Akhila

          sunny day here…but all of a sudden some heavy rain drops fell for a few seconds..big big drops..
          akhi….

          Like

          Reply
          1. pins & ashes Avatar
            pins & ashes

            aha! big big big drops.. 🙂 suddenly I felt typing out 6 letters was too long, lazy excuse 😀

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply
  18. Bikramjit Avatar
    Bikramjit

    The difference is people generated .. If one is doing somethig with all confidence and succeeds it’s called confidence.. and if one fails usually people says oh he was over confident.

    Over confidence is also in connection with boasting some people have this attitude to boast about what they have achieved or achieving ..In that context also we say over confidence

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      so true Bikram…it’s is all people generated versions..i heard like if you think only you can do it, then people call it as your overconfidence…difference versions of a word…

      Like

      Reply
  19. myheartbeats4ublog Avatar
    myheartbeats4ublog

    Today in a pure listening mode(as regards this post).. interesting set of questions, and comments…

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      ohkay.. did you paint your rubix cube with a new version of love color..?

      Like

      Reply
      1. myheartbeats4ublog Avatar
        myheartbeats4ublog

        Yes ma’am..which colour would you suggest

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
        1. Akhila Avatar
          Akhila

          white

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply
          1. myheartbeats4ublog Avatar
            myheartbeats4ublog

            white. for purity and peace…hmmm

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply
  20. Varsh Avatar
    Varsh

    Overconfidence blinds our approach to a certain extent. I’m the best and invincible…is a good thing to know but won’t necessarily be true for long. There’s always some confident person around who isn’t boasting and trying hard to get better.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      i think it’s a wrong word or a wrong usage..may be something deep rooted in our mindsets that a confident person wont do boasting while the overconfident person mat do….

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Varsh Avatar
        Varsh

        I think the ‘over’ word itself implies something unnecessary. A confident person knows his limitations but overconfident one would probably be too proud to accept it. Boasting is a foolish thing to do in any case…Sachin Tendulkar never boasted. This bat did that for him. To boast is to undermine your own stature.

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
        1. pins & ashes Avatar
          pins & ashes

          what a discussion on the use of words! Well, the basis is know your self, sort yourself out, you’ll get to know what you are and how good or bad you are. Once that mental introspection is done then all falls into place. If it is a hollow sense, then the person will get to know sooner..

          Liked by 2 people

          Reply
          1. Varsh Avatar
            Varsh

            Yes. ☺

            Like

            Reply
        2. Akhila Avatar
          Akhila

          a confident person know where to draw the lines..does it mean that he can never fail? and interestingly when he failed , people attributed it to his over confidence..all some word plays..

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply
          1. pins & ashes Avatar
            pins & ashes

            Again there is nothing called failure ya! I wanted to run 1km non stop for the marathon, I did, but I did not take the podium stand. In my eyes I succeed in what I was determined to do. Confidence does not happen over a minute, it takes time, effort, diligence, practice and target! it is a process!

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply
          2. Varsh Avatar
            Varsh

            Confidence is for us to know and understand. People can go take a hike!

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply
  21. my valiant soul Avatar
    my valiant soul

    You know if once you are overconfident you will stop to perceive your competition,you will do just your best and boast about it wheras you need the future strategy too for succeeding much in life.Confidence provides us determination and hope whereas overconfidence lets us demoralize others to an extent.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      overconfidence lets us demoralize others to an extent…do you think this can really happen..I mean, can you ever think, ‘it is only you who can do this in the best way’…do you think that this to be the definition of overconfidence..

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply
      1. my valiant soul Avatar
        my valiant soul

        I am not defining the word over confidence dear one,but tell me if you get overconfident won’t you think you can always achieve your targets easily?Won’t you feel everything is easy for you and maybe hard for others?Just an opinion!

        Liked by 2 people

        Reply
        1. Akhila Avatar
          Akhila

          infact I am trying to understand the hairline gap between conf. and over conf. and frankly speaking i could not find a situation where my confidence or the so called over confidence( i donno whichever) mislead me.

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply
          1. my valiant soul Avatar
            my valiant soul

            It’s a good thing if it does not misleads you.Anything which does not harms you or anyone else is in a nutshell good indeed!

            Liked by 2 people

            Reply
            1. Akhila Avatar
              Akhila

              and my point how can people tell like she/he was confident that she/he win it or he/she was overconfident that he/she failed it.. is it all decided by the people around us..?

              Liked by 1 person

              Reply
              1. my valiant soul Avatar
                my valiant soul

                Nope,saying that someone failed because of being overconfident is not right as many other factors can be responsible if you fail.All I intend to say is confidence is something that guides your soul and once you get over confidence,you don’t even at times realise what can be the pros and the cons in a long run.In your case as you said you never got mislead due to overconfidence,so that’s a pretty good thing I guess!

                Liked by 2 people

                Reply
            2. pins & ashes Avatar
              pins & ashes

              but confidence and over confidence is intimidating to the other if they have their own cooked up problems!! #pov
              Plus I think confidence is what we as a person feel overconfidence is what the other feels about a confident us. So it is a gap between perception like you and them. But, confidence should not lead to an arrogant know it all state of mind where no more learning happens. if then, the fall down the mountain begins!

              Liked by 1 person

              Reply
              1. my valiant soul Avatar
                my valiant soul

                It’s really simple.If you are simply confident your deeds would show that,like I read someone giving an example of Sachin Tendulkar..so how do we decide he is confident or over confident?But as far as I see him,I am sure through his interviews I could conclude that he is a confident personality because had he been over confident,he must have seen something nobody wished for.There is a thin line between the two..you can tell that by looking any great personality!Over confidence is really amazing..only in short run.

                Liked by 1 person

                Reply
                1. pins & ashes Avatar
                  pins & ashes

                  Agreed, we can know by looking at a person about their levels of their confidence.

                  Disagree with the Sachin example, because of what he did with his waiting for his 100 100s and what he has been doing after his retirement. I would use Kumble as an example or say, Dravid! 🙂

                  But I get your point, and taken well 🙂

                  Liked by 1 person

                  Reply
                  1. my valiant soul Avatar
                    my valiant soul

                    Ahh,take any example dear!You would surely know through their deeds.And Sachin making his decisions..how can that be related to confidence level?That is entirely the lessons of life,sometimes we make good choice and sometimes bad ones!Glad you could relate a bit.:)

                    Liked by 2 people

                    Reply
                    1. pins & ashes Avatar
                      pins & ashes

                      Hahaha! that’s why I said, point taken and taken well.. Sachin was a pleasant deviation since you brought it up 🙂

                      I think I wrote as a reply elsewhere here it self, like you are saying..

                      Confidence is like an iceberg.. because to attain a level of confidence is a journey in itself.. searching for the soul, the guts to move on, not to fall back .. all that packaged into one.

                      Liked by 1 person

                    2. my valiant soul Avatar
                      my valiant soul

                      Well yeah that’s another chapter..how to be a confident person!For attaining that a hell of things have to be experienced.

                      Liked by 2 people

  22. kiranmag Avatar
    kiranmag

    The gap is the word ‘over’ with an” I” that brings you down …everybody experiences it …but the most imp thing is not let it happen repeatedly

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      hmm.. this is what everyone say…maybe it is the perspective difference..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. kiranmag Avatar
        kiranmag

        Hope its clear Akila ☺ …have a nice day

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
        1. Akhila Avatar
          Akhila

          have a good day..

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply
  23. Hemangini Avatar
    Hemangini

    in our minds we are always small, others are better.. we are brought up telling ourselves that and that mentality is hard to get rid of. Mostly we are told we are no better and that someone out there is always better then us. okay agreed, someone must be better then us. But why compare, you are you and I am me! end of line. but still comparing never stops and sometimes its hard to find someone who would encourage us or uplift us… Better be that person who uplifts and encourages, maybe some times cautious but never discouraging.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
    1. Akhila Avatar
      Akhila

      there is a version for overconfidence, i.e people define it as “I can only do this, no one else” . Why do we need to bother about whether others.. we need to offer our best.. that’s it. isn’t it..? and as you said, there is no point in such comparison..

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

Leave a comment

Previous Post
Next Post

Create a website or blog at WordPress.com

Discover more from words and notion

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading